Tag Archives: success

On The Fly

The confidence that I had in my fitness a few days ago is now as unstable as my knee, wavering in a stiff breeze. Since I am still two and a half weeks out, I am reconsidering my my race prep strategy. It is definitely a heavy schedule and I think I might have given myself a little much credit to think I can conquer and thrive with this program.

Last week I did two workouts a day, twice, just to fit it all in around my clients, but that resulted in runs ending early, running too slowly, or just putting myself through unnecessary pain for mediocre outcomes.

It also resulted in me barely being able to keep my eyes open past 5pm.

Throughout the week, I was happy with the effort that I was putting in, but when it came time to run a 5km (yesterday’s planned workout), I was too burnt out from my workouts for the run to come together as planned.

My 5km turned into a 4km in 20:10; I guess I would rather run a decent 4km than a bad 5km. It’s not like I should practice gutting out that last kilometer in preparation for the race or anything. In a race scenario I would be asking a lot of myself to get through that last kilometer with my fastest pace with these type of training runs. Just because I am confident that I am capable of a sub 25 probably doesn’t mean I should get comfortable and train like an idiot.

I haven’t actually made any changes to my programming yet, but I think I’m asking too much from my body. It does seem to be a trend that no one else thinks my muscles are as big as I do, so maybe I should step back and re-evaluate.

I have convinced myself that any inactivity could give my knees a chance to go back to their old ways of getting all bent out of shape. So instead of listening to my body I’m just trying to keep things moving aggressively. Logical.

A rolling stone keeps rolling faster, and faster, and faster.

As long as I can squeak out my sub 25 run in 19 days then I will consider myself to have been successful.

For now, anyways.

 

BlogRun

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The Pace to Race

Last Sunday was race day.

It was not as fast or as glorious as I had hoped it to be, but I finished the race vertical and left inspired to work harder and come back faster. So I think I can check that off as a success in one way or another.

As much as I would love to list my excuses for not hitting my goal time in an attempt to justify that it was the Universe’s fault, I was happy with how I ran four of the five kilometers. The first kilometer did me in but it was a learning experience. Or a reminder, anyways.

I could list all of the training runs I did in faster times, all the intervals I ran, and tell you about the days I didn’t feel like running but did it anyways. It doesn’t matter how good the workouts are if they don’t build on each other and if they don’t come together. In this case, neither of those may be the issue but my body just couldn’t do it.

And that’s okay.

The bar is set at 25:44.

And now I’m going to smash it.

I have three more races planned this year, because if I don’t keep challenging myself then how will I know what I can do. I am not running how I want to, but I know where I want to get to. My goal is to stay injury- free to race June, August, and October and improve on my time each run.

Just keep trotting.

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Oh The Places You’ll Go

The most dangerous thing in life is our biases and preconceptions. Living as if our younger selves were fortune tellers means always holding ourselves up to a idealized standard that never really existed. I pictured myself at a very different place at 26, but now that I am here, I am not in that elusive magical cookie cutter life. I also used to think that 26 sounded old, but I still act immature so that can’t be right.

The older I get, the more I wish I had taken Dr. Seuss more seriously. The cartoons in his rhymes always suggested to me that the books were not to impart anything substantial, but looking back, Dr. Seuss was one of the first cheerleaders in most of our homes.

“If things start happening, don’t worry, don’t stew,
Just go right along, and you’ll start happening too”
-Dr. Seuss

Lately, my head has been overwhelmed with a constant effort to decipher what I think I want from what I actually want. Even that sentence confuses me. There have been a few occasions where the amount of conflicting ideas screaming over top of each other in my head make me think that I will be the next Torontonian sleeping on the subway and talking to imaginary friends. Except I plan to gracefully exit this phase at some point. Fingers crossed that crazy can just be a pit stop.

Moving to Toronto was a situation that I did not think through and was not a part of a plan in any way. It was a good idea at the time and I happily arrived to a new city feeling like I was moving forward but was really chasing my tail. It was an opportunity that the world gave me to grow up real fast but I responded by dragging my heels and wasting as much energy as possible to stay in my comfortable little rut. So, instead, I learned some life skills the hard and tedious way after they came around a few more times. I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks though; throw me a treat Universe, I get it.

After reading through some of my posts, I feel like my blog is a motivational speaker that struggles with motivation. There is always a point and often a positive message that gets sidetracked or overtaken by stories or stats of how much I can deadlift (115lbs for 3×10. See how I slipped that in there!) At least I believe I can keep myself from living in a van down by the river. (If you don’t get that joke you should watch this and laugh with me)

So tonight I skipped my food prep for tomorrow and most of studying to write this, and dance around my apartment. It is hard to take life advice from Taylor Swift but she sure can make me dance. And yes, this was my life changing revelation. Just roll with it.

 

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I Am a Quitter

Sometimes we hang on for too long. Whether it is dedication, laziness, stupidity, or otherwise, very few of us live always looking to jump into something new. We like where the couch has a worn-in groove for us, we like familiar faces around us, and we like the security that monotony can offer.

There is comfort to be found in discomfort. Only the weak quit, right?

That uneasy unknowing of what may come is overwhelming if we consider a deviation from our routines.  Anyone can tell you the downsides to their situation, but then how many can give you their steps to resolution. Collectively, why do we agonize about things that we keep in our lives? Why are we so eager to tell others about our complaints, but not how we are going to improve?

Life gets hard but how did we get convinced that this needs constant promotion?

So when is throwing in the towel appropriate? When can we release our grip on what we know best and open our palm to whatever the world may hand us? Just because we know something best does not mean it is best for us. Events, people, and tribulations, all come into our lives for a reason and although we cannot control their entry, we absolutely determine their cause.

Having only two hands means we need to let some things go to hold on to what is most important. This is not a ball pit and everything is not equal. Not knowing what you want doesn’t mean you hold on to as much as possible, it is a process. It is moving and pursuing despite requiring a backslide or two. Thankfully, momentum works in mysterious ways.

For a generation of people who tend to search out the new rather than repair the old, I know many who are just hanging on. We still exist- the hard workers who were raised with fresh air and vegetables. Brought up by parents who asked questions to which they knew the answers, so that we would have to think for ourselves.

So as much as quitting is not something I find pride in, I am going to have to take it up. I have been doing the same things for too long and I do not want to settle.

Like I said before, I expect big things from myself this year. To make that happen, I need to release my hold on old practises so my hands are free to keep reaching.

wholeheartedly

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Gold and Goal

To celebrate my achievement of beating my goal time (by 28 seconds!) and my time from last weekend (by 51 seconds!) I decided to reward myself. So I tried.
Monday was supposed to be a day off from exercise and a guilt- free day to eat anything. One muffin later, my stomach told me to pick something else.
After I was done training for the day, D and K were starting their workouts. Like the good friends they are, they made sure to give me a really hard time about taking the day off. Other tips included “don’t eat cookies!” and “why are you going to bed so early!” which made it feel less like a day celebrating my victory. These guys come in handy when I feel lazy though, so I won’t complain.

So now I am looking ahead at what is next to come. It is too bad that I’m just getting started as racing season is wrapping up but I still have options. I can keep racing through the winter since apparently Mother Nature isn’t totally against me, or I can focus my efforts elsewhere. I have a lot of friends who train and compete in figure competitions so that has crossed my mind but my body is still working on basic level functioning. That would be like trying to take the whole flight of stairs at once.

The best part of making a comeback is passing the benchmark that you had set before.

I still remember my last workout before the car accident. It was the day before and I was feeling great. An easy run to the park, 100 lunges, 10 hill sprints, then I ran home at a 3:51/km pace. I will have to use that as a baseline to see just when I surpass my (old) self. But not yet. Anyways, I am thinking even further ahead than that.

Swimming in a race in a lake terrifies me; the thought of getting back on a bike makes me nervous; but I can absolutely run. So, next summer I will do my first triathlon.

With two attempts, I have achieved my first goal and now it is on to the next one! It is big, and it is challenging, and I am looking forward to every scary step of the way!

Cue the motivation saying!!!

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